I’m sorry, you must be at least a level 4 friend to unlock my tragic backstory
If a boss was in a room full of his employees, would his position of power automatically be taken away?
My heart still hurts when I think about it. It’s one of those aches that sits and starts to suffocate you if you focus on it too long. This isn’t how I want things to be. I don’t like forcing conversation, trying to salvage the shredded remains through a smile and some small talk. I want it to go back to the way it was. Back when I could call you or text you whenever. Back when I didn’t have to try and read your mood to see if it’s okay to even talk to you. Back when the smiles were genuine and we asked things because we actually wanted to know. Back to when a hug was all it took..
But that’s my naivety speaking. I know that things can never go back to the way it was, but I hope that just because we can’t go back and change the past, things from here on out won’t remain as jilted and rigid.
I know words don’t work for you now, no matter how sincere they might be, and I know my actions won’t seem genuine because of the circumstance.
So, maybe this isn’t our time right now; maybe in the future we will be able to come back from this with smiles on our faces and love in our hearts for our mistakes and our differences. Maybe what we need is time. Time for ourselves; to love ourselves so much that we can then devote our time to loving those around us wholly. Time to let the wounds that we inflicted on each other, intentionally and accidentally, heal completely… if they even can. I respect that time. I respect the space that this sort of thing requires and I sit patiently as time works to heal all wounds.
I still love you. I always have and I always will, regardless of if these wounds heal or not.